Writing a book is a long, personal, fulfilling, and vulnerable project, to name just a few adjectives. It’s such a big undertaking that it feels incredibly good to be able to claim, “I wrote a book all on my own.”

But even such a personal project was never meant to be tackled alone.

It’s easy to give ourselves all the credit since we’re the ones writing all the words. And though we should congratulate ourselves for a job well done, let’s not ignore those who help us achieve our success. Even our family and friends who support us wholeheartedly when we tell them we’re writing a book are so, so valuable. We rarely realise the help that something as simple as an encouraging word gives us.

But there’s another category of people who deserve way more credit than we give them: the people who listen. Do you have a listener in your life? The one who will listen to all of your crazy ideas without interruption? They might offer occasional suggestions, but mostly, they just nod and smile as you work things out by thinking out loud.

Don’t underestimate the power of asking someone for help, even if you just need them to listen. Many times, I’ve gotten stuck in a certain part of a story and asked my husband if I could talk to him about it. Usually, I explain the story and the problem. My husband offers solutions and I mostly veto them, but the process of explaining why a certain solution won’t work brings me closer and closer to finding the right solution until – aha! I suddenly stumble across the answer I’ve been searching for all along.

Thinking out loud – especially when another person is listening – focuses our ideas. That’s why talking it out is my tried and true method of getting unstuck when I’m writing. I always come out of it with a way to keep going.

Who is the listener in your life? Find a family member, friend, spouse, or someone else you trust, and don’t be afraid to reach out to them for help when you need it.

Happy writing!
-E.J.

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